The Aheader I Go; the Behinder I Get

I can't believe it has been nearly a month since my last entry. I have been busy trying to get my book to market and setting up my web site. Both are really time consuming. My darling Judy keeps asking me "When are you going to finish this? You've been working on it FOREVER!" That is exactly what it seems like to me. It seems like I have hit every kind of stumbling block imaginable. Since I am putting it on CreateSpace, I have had to make tons of adjustments. I have had to resize the copy to fit book size paper, change the line spacing, change the fonts for the chapter headings and body text, reset all of the margins, and unify the book into a single file. Gadzooks, what a bunch of chores. Not having the proper software only made these things harder to do. Fortunately, I was able to come up with some suitable work-arounds that let me, finally, finish the job. Or so I thought. As it turned out, I still had to convert the files to Adobe's pdf format before uploading it. Then came doing the cover art. Another nightmare. I had to rework it five times before it was okay for their site. At long last, the ball is in their court and, if no more pitfalls occur, the book will be printed.
I was naive to think that all I would have to do is send the book to a publisher, and they would take it from there. I would get an advance, they would do all of the publicizing and advertising, and all I would have to do is appear on TV talk shows and at book signings. My little book, Double Trouble on Corned Beef Row, is not an epic. It is a little story about Jewish identical twins separated at birth. It is not the Corsican Brothers or The Man in the Iron Mask. It would have take a miracle for a major publisher to grab it up like that so I am gambling that by self publishing someone might see it. I still hold out hope that fellow Baltimorean Barry Levinson will learn about it and, maybe, take a look at it. That probably falls under the heading of "still dreaming, aren't you?" Well, if the Wright brothers felt that way, my sister, Jane, would not be working for an airline and a trip to Chicago from the East Coast would take a long ride on a train. If I stop dreaming, I may wake up and find the world really sucks. What then?

Will the dream die with me?

Disillusionment has set in. What I believed was a real publisher was actually just a "come on" for one of those self publishing outfits. Whom can you trust? There are so many bogus entities floating around out there in cyberspace. It is difficult to separate the scams and the shams from the legitimate. I guess the old saw about things too good to be true is right. For now, it is back to square one. I believe in my book, "Double Trouble on Corned Beef Row," and I thought the "publisher" did, too. They played me like a Stradivarius. Now, my greatest fear is that I will die before it ever gets into print. It's a story about identical Jewish twins separated at birth and living dramatically different lives. It is the kind of story Barry Levinson would like because it involves a Baltimore landmark, Lombard Street's Corned Beef Row, a deli owner, and spies fighting over a secret weapon stolen from the Israelis. The way things look now, he will never know it exists.
At 71, diabetic, overweight, and arthritic, I am running out of time. It took me two years to finally get my book into what I believed to be really enjoyable reading. Were those years I could have put to better use? I loved/hated the process. Envisioning the story, I loved. All of the editing, and re-rewriting was a chore. Unfortunately, only the reading public will determine if it was a worthwhile endeavor. If that ever happens. Sometimes, life really sucks.

Hello, Hollywood??

Have you ever tried to contact a live person at a Hollywood movie studio? I have been trying to get a message through to Barry Levinson, who, like me, grew up in Baltimore. I think he might be interested in my book, "Double Trouble on Corned Beef Row," because it is set in a Baltimore landmark. Mr. L has done several movies with Baltimore themes, and his "Homicide: Life on the Streets," was filmed there, too. The problem I encountered is layer upon layer of firewalls preventing any access. Maybe after the book hits the stores someone will tell him about it. Guess I'll just have to wait and see.